I hope you can feel the same way I feel for these books
Blood Meridian (1985) - Cormac McCarthy
Currently this is my favorite book of all times. If could describe Blood Meridian in a few words I would say unexpectedly beuatiful and y sadly brutal. This story couldn't be told with the same effectiveness if it wasn't for Cormac's peculiar way of writing. To be honest I didn't find it hard to read as some people told me, actually that first words ('See the child. He is pale and thin, he wears a thin and ragged linen shirt') set the tone for what comes next. Keep in mind this is the first Cormac McCarthy's book I've ever read and I think it's a great first exposition of the topics and the type of stories he wrote about. I insist they way this book is written it's so fascinating to me, it's was biblical at times and even I felt I was seeing a movie while I read it, it's that good really. I know it can be kind of off putting the fact that he doesn't use commas, but when you get used to it flows very well. About the characters well, there's so much to say about them, because in Blood Meridian the nature of its characters is left ambiguous on purpose so are their moral compasses. The Judge Holden was supernaturally terrifying and he was just so cruel. His discourse about war being an inherently part of human behaviour is somenthing I do believe. I loved how there was this moral dispute between the ex priest Tobin and the Judge Holden and how the Kid was just standing in the middle, choosing an anodyne path. Other aspect I really love about Blood Meridian is the tarot references and all the supernatural kind of stuff overall, it gives the story a layer of misticism. About my favorite quotes, I would say the "Whatever in creation that exist without my knowledge, exist without my consent" was brutal, like I felt scared the moment I read that sentence; and also, I love the opening. It's hard to peak a quote from Blood Meridian, the whole book was beautiful.
Demian, Die Geshichte von Emil Sinclairs Jugend (1919) - Herman Hesse Der Steppenwolf (1927) - Herman Hesse
Demian was such an event in my life when I first read it at the bare age of 11. It felt like someone was speaking directly towards me about all the things that would eventually happen once adolescence began. I've never felt so seen in a book character as with Emil Sinclair (and this is kind of a spoiler of what comes next in my list, because Harry Haller is another character I deeply relate to). Demian begins with the definition of the two worlds Emil has in his mind; one world it's the light and it's clean and it's represented by very protected enviroment by his family values, while the other world it's dark and dirty and dangerous, it's about all the bad things that people don't talk about and sometimes it's seems like it's hidding within the light world. That concept right there was so powerful to me, because I had the same impression when I was a little kid; I felt like in my home everything was in order, it was indeed very clean and warm and if I felt bad someone would listen to me and it felt good having a good behaviour and doing the things I was supposed to do, but I knew deep down that this couldn't last forever because outside of my house, there was a violent and wild world that slipped in the news headlines or in the parents of my classmates. Maybe I took this is a personal interpretation, but it was what really resonated with me. Then, when Emil Sinclair hits puberty he feels like he starts living a double life and that he, irremediably was moving away from the innocence of childhood, like wasn't welcome anymore. And that also spoke volumes to me, because I was feeling the same way at that age, it was like even your parents wouldn't recognize you and you were guilty of some kind of crime you didn't know. Afterwards the appearence of Demian starts to kind of bother Emil and another point I also liked about the book was the relationship between Demian and Emil. I saw Demian as a metaphor of maturity (that explains the end in my opinion) and well, The Great War temporal context, added a layer of hopelessness I liked. Now Demian it's a book I revisit constantly because the book changes as I change too.
Yeah, here it goes another Herman Hesse book. This one I read it